Photograph by Jonathan Bachman

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It must be completely maddening to be a Hornets fan right now. As if teetering around .500 for most of the season isn’t enough, it seems as if every game that passes distances the Hornets even further from playoff contention (they’re currently 6.5 games back of the eighth seed). All this while David West puts up All-Star numbers and rookies Darren Collision and Marcus Thornton continue to produce in tough losses.

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Friday night’s 102-95 loss against the Denver Nuggets was almost like a microcosm of the Hornets’ season. David West put up 30 points and six rebounds, Thornton scored 23 points and Collison registered a double-double with 17 points and 10 assists. The Hornets were undermanned (only eight players dressed) and yet a game that had been close throughout fell apart in the span of around 2:30 minutes in the fourth quarter.

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“I think we made a couple of mistakes down the stretch offensively,” West said. “Then a couple of times on the defensive end, we had the rebound, then gave it back to Chauncey [Billups]. We just gave them extra possessions we didn’t need to give.”

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With the score tied at 86 with 6:05 left in the game, the Hornets proceeded to committed two fouls, two ridiculous turnovers and suddenly, with 2:46 left in the game, New Orleans was down by 10 and fans were walking dejectedly towards the exits. The Hornets are now falling completely out of the playoff picture, and every opportunity they have to build momentum seems to fall short. Granted, the Hornets have dealt with a slew of injuries, but they’re not using that as an excuse.

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“I don’t think it affected us,” Emeka Okafor said. “I think the guys knew we had to bring a little more energy. Everybody knew they were going to get more minutes.”

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Anyone who thinks that the Hornets are better than their record suggest are clearly deluding themselves into a better reality that what the rest of us see. Without Chris Paul in the lineup, the Hornets have steadily fallen farther and farther out of playoff contention. New Orleans has lost eight straight games against Western Conference teams that would be in the post-season if the playoffs started tomorrow. Their last win against a potentially playoff-bound team was January 30th against Memphis.

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“There are problem areas that we need to work on as with every game,” head coach Jeff Bower said. “We are definitely going to learn and grown form this game and make sure we apply what we learned into the next game coming up.”

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Despite what Bower said, this team has had a lot of troubler learning from their losses. As a playoff-less future comes closer to being the present, the Hornets are a team in limbo. Ever the competitor, Paul is dying to return to the court, even if it may be too late to rally his team to the post-season. Collison has played admirably in Paul’s absence and, having already played 40 or more minutes 18 times this season, letting him play out the season may be in the team’s best interest.

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There is also the issue of West. He’s playing head-and-shoulders above his teammates and, with the ability to opt-out of his contract after next season, rumors abound as to just how long he will be playing in the Crescent City. The Hornets are a relatively young team with an emerging core of players that could carry them in the years come, as well as a slew of contracts that expire after next season. As the present starts to slip away, you have to look toward the future. Then again, trying to figure out what’s in store for this team in the coming months may be as maddening and watching them play right now.

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Many of you know Chef Who Dat (note: click here for essential viewing) and the cavalcade of characters that inhabit section 641 of the Superdome. Here’s the Chef before last season’s Monday Night game versus Atlanta:

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Like many (if not all) stadium secions, the season-ticket holding patrons at “Cafe 641″ have developed a tight-knit community that’s led to silliness, some bike crawls, and now, a cancer fundraiser with a twist. Per the e-mail I received today:

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A Cafe 641 patron and season-ticket holder, Sean Niehus, is raising money for St. Baldrick’s, a foundation that raises money for children’s cancer research. Sean has agreed to shave his head at the annual St. Baldrick’s shave-a-thon AND to grow a mustache. To help him raise money, we’re auctioning off a pair of tickets to the 2010 Saints/Bucs game in Section 641, Row 40, Seats 13-14.

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I like how not only is Niehus shaving his head, but that he’s also growing a mustache in the tradition of Cafe 641’s Patron Saint. Check out his picture, going from long blonde hair to a shaved head and a mustache would be a stark transformation. Gotta give to a guy willing to do that for a good cause.

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Bid’s can be made on the tickets on eBay here or you can donate directly to St. Baldricks by clicking here. And yes, that is Chef Who Dat in a wedding dress on that eBay listing. Not sure how that will help with the bidding.

Photograph by Jonathan Bachman

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The easiest and most obvious way to measure the worth of a team is by looking at their record. The Hornets, after holding off the Golden State Warriors 135-131 Monday night at New Orleans Arena, the Hornets sit at 32-32 and in 10th place in the Western Conference standings. They are neither that good, nor that bad, relatively speaking and, if they played in the East, very well could be in the playoffs. In the end, you could make arguments either way as to the quality of this team.

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On one hand, the Hornets played well. Their 135 points was a season-high, Darren Collison set a new Hornets rookie record with 20 assists (also an NBA game-high this season) and six Hornets finished in double figures (including David West and Marcus Thornton, who each finished with 28 points) and three finished with double-doubles. Collison continued to show poise at the point and delivered late with the ball in his hands. The Hornets shot well and, in the end, scored more points than their opponents.

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On the other hand, the Warriors are objectively a terrible team. They have the third-worst record in the whole league, have the second-worst defense in the league and only had eight players in uniform in their loss to the Hornets (a game in which the Hornets gave up a season-high 131 points). So while there are definite positives signs to take away from the win for New Orleans, the glaring negative is that this team has been unable to show this type of production against potential playoff teams in the West.

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In their last four games, the Hornets lost all four to teams ahead of them in the Western Conference standings (including two terrible double-digit losses to the San Antonio Spurs). Dating back to the start of February, the Hornets have had just two wins against teams with better records (against Boston and Orlando). Of their 19 remaining games, 14 are against teams currently in the playoffs or fighting for a spot.

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And while every win counts, some wins mean more than others. Edging out one of the worst teams in the league in a defense-optional shoot-out does not make up for getting blown out by twice in three games against a division rival. Especially when those losses are part of a four-game losing streak against potentially playoff-bound teams. The Hornets scored quality wins against the Magic and the Celtics but couldn’t carry that momentum into wins against Western Conference teams in their next games.

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No, the Hornets may not be bad enough to completely miss out on the playoffs, but they haven’t shown they’re good enough to make it in either.

It was a beautiful Sunday in New Orleans … the birds were singing … the streetcars were clanging … people were strolling … and then … the Fu Fighter said goodbye. From the Cleveland Browns’ official Web site:

The Cleveland Browns today signed linebacker Scott Fujita and offensive lineman Tony Pashos to multi-year contracts as unrestricted free agents, the team announced. Fujita, an eight-year veteran, spent the past four seasons with the New Orleans Saints. Pashos, a veteran of seven NFL seasons, spent last year with the San Francisco 49ers.

“We are extremely happy that we were able to get Scott and Tony signed so quickly,” said Browns General Manager Tom Heckert. “They are two players we had targeted from the start of free agency. Both are smart, tough and physical - the type of players that the Browns are looking for.

“Scott possesses tremendous size for a linebacker, and this will allow him to play inside or outside in our 3-4 defense. He has been a starter throughout his career, has been exposed to several different defensive schemes and has been successful in all of them. He is a great leader and played a big part in the success that the Saints achieved last year.

See ya, Scott.

As we reported yesterday, Rep. Tim Johnson (R-Ill.) was the only member of the U.S. House of Representatives to vote against congratulating the New Orleans Saints on their Super Bowl victory. Well, it turns out Johnson has an opponent vying for his 15th Congressional District seat in Illinois: Dr. David Gill, an E/R physician, a Democrat, and — most important — a good sport. In many ways. In many, many ways, as it turns out.

We put in a call to Dr. Gill yesterday to seek comment, and he got back to us today … not because he was blowing us off, but because he had been working in the emergency room, heroically saving lives, instead of voting against the Saints on the floor of the House of Representatives.

Here is Dr. Gill’s official statement on the Black and Gold Super Bowl victory:

I watched the game. I’m a football nut, and the New Orleans Saints receive my heartiest congratulations. And kudos to Drew Brees! I used to watch him at Purdue.

Dr. Gill took the time for a brief interview about the differences between him and his opponent:

GAMBIT: When you are not busy heroically saving people’s lives, what other impressive feats do you perform that Rep. Tim Johnson does not?

GILL: Hmm. I still play a mean game of tennis. I don’t know he’s capable of that. I can play sports trivia like a champ. And I still read out loud every night to my youngest if I’m not working in the emergency room.

GAMBIT: That is so nice! Dr. Gill, several of our readers have suggested your opponent is — and I quote — a “douche.” Do you have any comment on that?

GILL: [laughing] Uh… I … I can understand why they’d come up with that thought. I try to be more diplomatic about it. There are many people here in central illlnois who would agree with that.

GAMBIT: Thank you, sir. One last question: Is someone who doesn’t congratulate the winners of the Super Bowl a filthy Communist, or simply un-American in his beliefs?

GILL: [laughing] I’ll go with un-American.

Thank you, Dr. David Gill! To learn more about Dr. Gill and his platform, visit his Web site.

DR. DAVID GILL: HEROIC AMERICAN … AND SAINTS FAN.

Today, Rep. Anh “Joseph” Cao (R-La.) introduced H.R. 1079 onto the floor of the U.S. House of Representatives — a bill congratulating the New Orleans Saints on their Super Bowl victory. Sure, it ain’t health care, but it’s the kind of collegial feel-good resolution that allows Congresscritters to give each other the warm fuzzies. The bill passed with overwhelming bipartisan support by a vote of … 375-1.

Yes, someone voted against congratulating the Saints for winning the Super Bowl. Who? This dude:

What a jackanapes you are, Rep. Tim V. Johnson of Illinois.

Here’s the footage of Cao introducing the resolution on the House floor. Nice.

Just one of those things to add the the “once you see it, you can’t unsee it” pile:

(via Michael G.’s Twitter)

Photograph by Jonathan Bachman

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The funnest part about the Saints Super Bowl victory has to be the sort of mock hubris the Saints players and coaches have shown as part of their celebration. Whether it’s Drew Brees going mad with power or Sean Payton pissing off Jerry Jones, these are moments for Who Dats everywhere to cherish (after all, when else have the Saints had any sort of reason to act this dickish?)

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If you haven’t heard, Peter King over at Sports Illustrated gives you this story of Coach Payton, a Saints victory dinner and Cowboys owner Jerry Jones’ favorite bottle of wine:

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On Friday night, the Saints’ staff at the combine gathered in a private room at St. Elmo Steakhouse, an 108-year-old Indy landmark, for a final celebratory nod to the Super Bowl win over the Colts. This is a group that likes its wine, and likes to have fun.

At the restaurant, word passed that Dallas owner Jerry Jones would have his Dallas group in this exact room Saturday night for a team dinner. Jones had even phoned ahead, according to a waiter, to make sure a magnum of a wine he loved, Caymus Special Selection cabernet sauvignon, was ready to be served at dinner.

Sean Payton told the waiter he’d like to have that wine, too. The waiter told him: Sorry, sir. We have only one bottle left, and it’s reserved for Mr. Jones.

Payton said he’d like to have the bottle nonetheless. I assume there was much angst on the part of the wait staff at that point. My God! Who do we piss off? One of the most powerful owners in the NFL, or the coach who’s the toast of the NFL, the coach who just won the Super Bowl?

Here came the bottle of Caymus Special Selection, and the Saints’ party drained it.

But drinking Jones’ wine wasn’t enough. Payton gave the waiter some instructions, took out his pen … and, well, the Cowboys party found at the middle of their table the next evening an empty magnum of Caymus Special Selection cabernet sauvignon, with these words hand-written on the fancy label:

WHO DAT!
World Champions XLIV
Sean Payton

That’s the kind of thing Jones will get a big laugh out of. And remember.

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Now on the surface, this looks like Payton having a lot of (deserved) fun. Saints fans will surely get a kick out of Payton rubbing it to the owner of the team that ended the Saints’ bid at a perfect season. But how will the rest of the country receive it? You know, the Boston Red Sox were everyone’s darling team too. And then they won the World Series and now everyone thinks they and their fans are just a bunch of smarmy jerks.

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Regardless of how the rest of the country sees it (and who cares, really?) dealing with a Championship is new territory for the Saints and New Orleans, and it’s really been a lot of fun watching it all unfold.

To the birther, truther, 9/11 Elvis Capricorn One Lee Harvey Oswald Conspiracy file, we can now add a new sinister theory: Peyton Manning intentionally threw the Super Bowl so the Saints would beat the Colts.

That’s the prospect raised by Terence Moore, columnist for the Web site NFL Fanhouse, in an entry titled “Peyton a Double Agent? Some Think So”:

I sought the views of the Colt Nation, and this was interesting: Spanning from Monument Circle to Conseco Fieldhouse to Circle Center Mall to the area near the little race track that features 500 miles each May, a slew of folks alluded to the “c” word, but not for choke. They viewed The Interception as their version of a second gunman on the grassy knoll — as in conspiracy.

Among the conspiracists, some said Manning threw The Interception on purpose to defensive back Tracy Porter who sprinted 74 yards for a touchdown to seal the Saints’ 31-17 victory. Most said he threw it subconsciously.

Whatever the case, both sides said Manning had the Saints’ welfare more than that of the Colts dancing around his mind at the moment.

Consider the evidence for the conspiracists: Manning was born and raised in New Orleans. And his father, Archie, is legendary around the Gulf Coast region. And the Mannings (which includes New York Giants quarterback Eli) knew as well as anybody before the game how much a world championship in New Orleans would brighten the souls of those still recovering from Hurricane Katrina. And [Reggie] Wayne, who possibly ran a shoddy route against Porter, also is from New Orleans.

So Reggie Wayne was in on it, too! This goes deeper than any of us could have imagined. But what does Indianapolis mayor Greg Ballard think of this possible act of civic sabotage?

He couldn’t stop laughing from the conference room next to his office when told of the Manning conspiracists who won’t back down.

“So Peyton works his entire life to get this point, and he’s going to throw it all away,” said Ballard, laughing again. His press secretary, Robert Vane, added nearby, between chuckles, “And we also never landed on the moon.”

But, seriously. Was that intentional?

Said Ballard, easing into the non-nonsense voice that he used when he was a lieutenant colonel for the Marines, “That’s ludicrous. It’s just plain ludicrous for people to think that way (about the Super Bowl). There is no question that Peyton Manning wanted to win that game.”

Zounds! Everyone knows that if you deny a conspiracy, you must be one of the conspirators! Apparently Mayor Ballard is in on it too!

At least (dun dun dun dun DUNNNN) … some think so.

Photograph by Jonathan Bachman

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Coming off a tough home loss to the Utah Jazz two nights ago, the New Orleans Hornets sat three games out of the final playoff spot in the Western Conference. With more than two-thirds of the teams left on their schedules sporting winning records, New Orleans needed to take advantage of a weak Pacers team to keep their playoff hopes alive.

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Led by surging rookie Darren Collison’s first career triple-double, the Hornets put on just the effort they needed in their 107-101 win. Contributions came from all over the floor - David West put up 29 points and notched a career-high seven assists, Emeka Okafor had a double-double, all five Hornets starters scored in double figures and 12 points off the bench. The Hornets led by as many as 21 points and, though the Pacers made a late surge in the fourth to bring the game within four, the game was never really in doubt.

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“We made some very good plays, some very good basketball reads,” head coach Jeff Bower said. “We did some instinctive things throughout the game that we’re really happy with that showed signs of guys making progress.”

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Hornets fans would be hard-pressed to remember the last time their team put forth such a complete effort that led to such a dominating win (on the heals of a rough loss against a conference foe, no less). But while the whole team won the game, the highlights had to go to the Hornets’ two rookies. Forced into extended minutes because of the injury to Chris Paul, both Thornton and Collison have responded with veteran-like performances. Collison is averaging 17.4 points, 8.2 assists and 3.9 rebounds a game and managing his team (almost) as well as Paul.

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“I was just going out ther and playing and my teammates were just telling me what I needed and being supportive,” he said. “My teammates kept telling me that I was close and reiterating that I was close to a triple-double and that I kept stealing their rebounds.”

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Talented and humble. But that’s what happens when your teammates make you walk around with a Disney princess backpack (Morris Peterson’s brilliant idea) and they find ways to keep you grounded even when you’re playing out of your mind. When Collison nearly had a triple-double a few games back, it was Paul pointing out how he came up short. This time, Collison’s teammates pointed to his eight turnovers.

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So long as the Hornets keep winning and Collison keeps putting up All-Star numbers, the rookie should be able to take everything his teammates say in stride.