The day-to-day rituals of parents with autistic children might easily be mistaken for shamanic remedies. One scene of “The Horse Boy” captures the parents of nine-year-old Rowan grinding vitamins and herpes medication with a mortar and pestle to create a therapeutic cocktail for their autistic son. The family’s days are nonetheless plagued with Rowan’s incessant tantrums and incontinence; at five years old, the boy remains resistant to toilet training. Though journalist and human rights activist Rupert Isaacson, Rowan’s father and the film’s narrator, says the documentary is a story of a family that “did something crazy,” traveling to Mongolia to seek indigenous healing for Rowan doesn’t seem very crazy at all. For a family living with autism, difficult journeys are nothing new. “I’ve had harder rides to the grocery store,” Rupert remarks in a later scene.

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We’re bundled pretty tightly here at Gambit, and for good reason. Temperatures are expected to remain low with a good chance of ice and that ugly, mud-slush kind of snow later in the week. Not the coziest outdoor environment. That’s why the Louisiana SPCA is warning all pet owners to include their pets in their freeze plans. “Pets are in just as much danger in the cold as humans,” reminds the LA/SPCA’s Katherine LeBlanc. Thankfully the LA/SPCA shelters have received plenty of donated blankets and towels. The freeze warnings continue throughout the week, so consider these plans for your pooch (or pet pal) as the harsh weather continues:

Bring them indoors. Animals are subject to hypothermia and frost bite — especially those ears.

If you can’t bring them inside, make sure their outdoor shelter protects them from high winds and low temperatures and has enough blankets and pillows.

Puppies, kittens and senior pets should not be kept outdoors. If our cat prefers the outdoors, bring them in, too. Cats seeking warmth might crawl into a warm car engine.

Turn off any gas furnaces and electric heaters when not at home. Don’t add a fire hazard to severe weather.

If we’ve learned anything this past year, it’s that people really like cats. People are especially interested when cats are in danger — as demonstrated by the slew of kittens-on-the-highway stories in the Times-Picayune this year — and when they are adorably botching subject-verb agreement. In fact, people like cats so much that they are willing spend hours and days trying to get them to use toilets.

The Wall Street Journal today, seemingly out of ideas, ran an article that is half-essay, half-how-to on cat potty training. The article delineates the risks and potential benefits of the process, as well discusses some (fairly expensive) innovations in feline potty training products. The article also has some D.I.Y. suggestions if you feel like cutting large holes into your cookware.

So if spending hours alone in the bathroom with your confused cat, warding off romantic prospects and house guests, and introducing resistant parasites into your home sounds tolerable in the pursuit of a litter-box free life, read this article to learn all about “thinking outside the box.” Or just be fascinated by peoples’ continued belief that pets are also humans.

I saw this last night during the 10 pm news and was thoroughly confused (of course, it could’ve just been the video hangover from an hour of Steven Seagal: Lawman, and crank up the Emmys for that, by the way). Anyway, behold the new commercial from the John Georges for Mayor campaign:

This resists all attempts at analysis, but maybe we can figure it out together.

INTENDED MESSAGES:

1) John Georges is too busy and too much of a hard-ass to pet an adorable Golden Retriever even when it’s sitting right next to him.

2) Rather than pet a dog who’s got its head on his freakin’ knee, John Georges would prefer to check the messages on his iPhone.

3) John Georges does not curse in his ads, unlike his opponent James *@%$ing Perry.

DELIVERED MESSAGES:

1) John Georges is too busy and too much of a hard-ass to pet an adorable Golden Retriever even when it’s sitting right next to him.

2) Rather than pet a dog who’s got its head on his freakin’ knee, John Georges would prefer to check the messages on his iPhone.

3) Somebody’s been watching too many Raising Cane’s and Bush’s Baked Beans commercials.

Honestly, on first viewing, I thought the dog was talking inside John Georges’ head, which set up a bunch of unpleasant Son of Sam associations that weren’t exactly mayoral.

Readers: what does this commercial mean?

This is Ricky the Cat, who was featured this week in “Weekly Tails,” Gambit’s adoptable-pet section:

Ricky is a 2-year-old spayed DSH with calico markings. She’s quite the tomboy and is good with other cats, dogs and kids. To meet Ricky or any of the other wonderful pets at the LA/SPCA, come to 1700 Mardi Gras Blvd. (Algiers), 10-4, Mon. Sat. and 12-4 Sun. or call 368-5191.

When Ricky’s picture went up on the wall, everyone at Gambit (OK, mostly me) was fascinated by her. Was she saying “HELLO THERE!!!!” Was Ricky clinically insane? Or was she just hilarious? (Suggestions of “hiring” Ricky to be the Gambit office cat went nowhere, alas.)

Ricky and her fate gnawed at me all week, so this afternoon I called Lori Haeuser at the LA/SPCA to see what else we could learn about Ricky the Cat.

“She’s on her way to Atlanta,” Lori reported. “They had 50 cats adopted out and had a shortage of kitties, which is wonderful. So we sent over 23 cats, and Ricky was among them.”

About that picture? “It is funny,” Lori said. “She’s a sweet cat. We just got her in mid-meow.”

What will happen to Ricky? Gambit’s I-Team will be devoting all its resources to tracking Ricky upon her arrival at the Atlanta SPCA and will be bringing you breaking, up-to-the-minute Ricky the Cat news as it occurs.