Sunglasses often meet any number of grisly fates. Whether they end up hurled from vertiginous roller coaster heights, lost at sea or just plain mangled, one constant is that sunglasses’ life expectancy rarely extends past hurricane season. Which is why I’m normally reluctant to shell out for a nice pair. If you’re the type to drop a few Benjamins on designer shades, though, you may be interested in a trunk show tonight at Loa hosted by St. Charles Vision and SALT from 5:30 p.m. to 9:30 p.m.

“They’re going to have a free fitting for the SALT frames, and people can also get a 20 percent discount (on SALT frames) at the event,” says St. Charles Vision publicist Erica Normand. “There’s going to be a complimentary Summer Sensation cocktail that Loa is putting together.”

On a related note, the Uptown St. Charles Vision location recently unearthed a selection of absolutely bad-ass vintage designer sunglasses. They have that angular, the-future-as-envisioned-from-the-80s vibe, and they’re as cheap as $50 a pair. I’m really proud of my vintage shades and swear they won’t suffer the gruesome fates of their predecessors and have developed a Gollum-level fixation on them, sedulously polishing the lenses and storing them in their sleek little coffin when they’re not in use.

Krewe founder Ro Mayer estimates that 500 people took to the streets of the Warehouse District during the Krewe of Dead Pelicans’ inaugural second line for the Gulf of Mexico last Saturday, June 5. Pair of Dice Brass Band led the funeral procession of blue-and-black clad, costumed second liners with tunes like “I’ll Fly Away” and Louisiana state song “You are My Sunshine.” At Gallier Hall, New Orleans’ former City Hall, mourners observed 11 minutes of silence, one for each victim of the Deepwater Horizon explosion: Jason Anderson, Dale Burkeen, Donald Clark, Stephen Curtis, Gordon Jones, Karl Dale Kleppinger, Roy Wyatt Kemp, Blair Manuel, Dewey Revette, Shane Roshto and Adam Weise. Mayer, pictured below in mourning clothes, explained her motives this way:

I wanted a New Orleans cultural event overlaid with a design, pattern, a theme, a logo, a motto and a chant. I wanted something pretty for the media that would be irresistible. Something pretty for the people to participate in so that we could distract ourselves with something useful from something horrible that we cannot access or do anything about, apparently.

Photos by Colin Miller

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And now, let’s take a moment away from BP coverage and focus on the latest B.T. (bow tie) developments. Since we won’t know whether the “top kill” procedure worked until this afternoon, now is the optimum time to put our collective mind elsewhere, perhaps on some meticulous yet satisfying task like mastering the origami-esque maneuvers of knotting a bow tie.

This evening at 6:30 p.m., menswear and etiquette blogger and notorious dandy K. Cooper Ray descends upon Brooks Brothers, (333 Canal St., 522-4200)
in a flurry of summer cocktails to celebrate the launch of a limited edition bow tie collection.

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In the summer of 2006, Mac McClelland left flood-ravaged New Orleans to volunteer as an English teacher in Thailand. Armed with a freshly-minted creative writing MFA and plenty of experience with squat toilets, McClelland was as prepared as anyone possibly could be for the situation in which she found herself: cohabiting with political refugees (terrorists, if you opt for our government’s parlance), ensnared in the fall-out of a civil war she hadn’t even known existed. Last week, the Mother Jones human rights reporter wrapped up her book tour with readings from For Us Surrender Is Out of the Question: A story from Burma’s never-ending war at Tulane University and the University of New Orleans. Here, she gives a few words about genocide, the differences between refugees and evacuees, and why, after 61 years of fighting, the Karen and the Burmese dictatorship find it next-to-impossible to give peace a chance.

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One of the pleasanter aspects of being special sections editor is that every month, I get to pick an exceptionally attractive person (or people, on really good months) to feature as a model for CUE’s fashion spreads. Whether it’s due to some virulent strain of hotness in the swamp water, a serendipitous side effect of miscegenation, or meticulous Southern belle and beau grooming habits, I can’t say, but Louisiana seems to breed hotties at a pace that rivals the reproduction rates of a nutria.

Enter the modeling masterminds at Launch Agency and John Robert Powers New Orleans, who have partnered with CUE to present the Modern Models Search Louisiana. We’ve joined forces to suss out the lithe, the high-cheekboned, the preternaturally tall and the freakishly good-looking from Chalmette to Shreveport. The contest’s winner will appear in a CUE fashion spread and receive a trip to the International Presentation of Performers (IPOP) conference (air fare, lodging and entrance fee paid). Submit your photos and stats to modernmodels@gmail.com by April 30 or check out the Facebook page or latest issue of CUE (on newsstands now) for guidelines.

For your viewing pleasure, I give you Brad Alphonso and Skylar McCartney, two locals who launched their fashion careers at IPOP and have gone on to sign contracts with Wilhelmina Models and NEXT Models International. Home-grown beauty, indeed.